Okay, so I know that most of you out there have seen on facebook that I recently made a trip to Arizona to spend the weekend with my guy! And I know that you are all also dying to know the whole story...so here it goes!
Right before my divorce was finalized I said to many people, "I will NEVER do any on-line dating website!" People lie, people put things on their profile that are untrue, and some are even still married when they are on these websites! And given my huge trust issues, I swore I would just never do it. But three weeks after the divorce was finalized, I joined. I know what you are thinking...why? Well, I decided, why not? I am 29, single, and I should live it up. Plus, there aren't many single people here in Missouri, so on-line dating is pretty much my only option.
On December 11, I ran across Brandon's profile. To tell you the truth, there was nothing special about it. He was cute, liked sports, loved the gospel, and said he was easy-going and loved to laugh (well, EVERY profile says that they are easy-going and that they love to laugh!) But, then I went through his pictures...and that's when something caught my eye! There was a picture of him with his little cousin and they were dressed in baseball clothes, and the heading under the picture said something about him coaching little league. SAY WHAT? Okay, I had to send this guy a note. So, I typed up a harmless e-mail to him, just saying that I loved the picture of him with his cousin, and how I thought it was cute that as a single guy, he was willing to coach little league in his spare time. That was pretty much it, and so I signed my name and thought nothing else about it.
The next day, I had an e-mail from him! He said he read over my profile and liked mine too. I really thought it was too wordy, but hey, that's me! Plus, I am going to be really picky the second time around, so it took a lot of words to explain what I wanted in a guy. :)
For one week we e-mailed back and forth harmless, non-flirtatious e-mails daily. They would just say things about our hobbies, our families, callings, etc. Simple. Then one Thursday night I was on that dating website checking my messages, and he popped up and wanted to IM with me. I accepted the invitation, and we chatted back and forth for about an hour. Harmless. Simple. Just small talk. And at this point I still wasn't that impressed. He was polite, and nice and all, but our IM session almost seemed dry. Although he is an accountant, so that didn't surprise me! (sorry babe!!) :)
We had to end our IM session suddenly due to some drama with 'S.' So, I felt like I should apolojize to Brandon for the sudden end in our conversation. I really wasn't thinking that we would ever talk again, remember...it was a dry conversation! But I wanted to be polite. So I sent him an e-mail just saying that I was sorry for our conversation ending so abrubtly. The next day(friday), he e-mailed me and said that he enjoyed our conversation and would love to chat again. I thought, 'really?' But whatever. Maybe from his end he thought things went good??
The next day, Saturday night, I was online checking my messages again, and he popped up to IM again. I ALMOST clicked 'decline,' but I thought, 'he was nice and all, so let's see where this goes.' And I am soooo glad I did!!
After three hours or so of IM'ing, I was hooked! I was laughing so much!! We had so much in common!! So, I guess he just needed to come out of his shell a little. (Which he did write on his profile...that he was shy at first, but then he opens up when he is comfortable). We talked about all the stupidest things, but it was so funny, but he felt the same way about things that I did! We even have the same OCD tendencies!! For example, he lines up his pop in the fridge by rows of what kind of pop it is, and I line up my yogurts by brands and flavors. I know...it seems stupid to some, but we thought it was funny!
After a few hours of IM'ing, I wondered how I could give him my cell phone number without seeming too forward. Sooooo, I typed...'here's my cell phone number for when you want to IM again. Just text me, and I will get online so we can IM again.' Then I typed my cell number. Well, within seconds he texted me! It said, 'is this too soon?' I smiled, got off-line with him, and proceeded downstairs to the couch (where I sleep), and texted him for about another 2 hours. I was giggling the whole time. We had so much in common, and he was so funny!! Where was this guy two nights ago?? He was so 'blah' the first time!
After texting awhile, I made a comment that my fingers were getting tired. He replies back, 'then should I call you?' I immeditely got butterflies. I wanted him to, but I was so nervous!!! This was too fast, too scary, too much! But I just jumped right in, and tried to let go of my fears, and just trusted. Well he called, and we ended up staying up until 4:40am talking. And I got up at 5:30a, because I was babysitting overnight, and that was when the kids woke up. So essentually, I pulled an all nighter. But it was well worth it!! I was smitten with this boy!!
That day was now Sunday, and I sang in the ward choir for the Christmas program. Well, after church he texted me and asked me how the singing went and said that he enjoyed talking with me, and wanted to know if we could do it again that night!! I smiled the biggest smile ever!! And replied that I would love to chat with him again.
Over the next several nights Brandon and I would talk 4-7 hours each night. Also, we would text thoughout the day, and chat on his lunch hours. Well, after only talking for 5 nights/days...I was throughly smitten!! He was so kind, and loving, and sweet, and polite, and funny!!! But what really did it was that he cared about me and the kids so easily!!
On day 5 of talking, Noah got sick, but we were headed up to Minnesota to see my BF Katie and her family for Christmas. I had to leave that day, because there was a snow storm coming through and I didn't want to get stuck in KC, so I piled Noah in the car, gave him a pillow and blanket, said a prayer, and we headed on our way. Well, this sweet man kept calling and asking how Noah was, and asking how my gas was (my gauge is broken, so I just have to keep track of my miles!). I asked him why he was being so nice to me, he replied, 'Because that is just what you do when you care about someone." Ah, this was bliss!! He generally cared about my safety, the safety and health of the kids, and about me being careful on the roads. And there is no way to describe how nice it felt to have someone generally care about me!! HEAVENLY!
After I got to Katie's I was texting Brandon like crazy, that was how we communicated primarily at that point during the day, so I could focus on the kids, than at night we would chat on the phone. Well, Katie and I got into a discussion about my texting and how much I liked this guy so early on, and how fast it was all going. So to ease her fears, I showed her his Facebook page, thinking she would see that he looked harmless, and was actually LDS, and single. (you never know!! Because people lie on those websites all the time!!!)
Oh, let me backtrack, early on, I let Brandon see my blog, and my Facebook page, just so that he would know I wasn't lying about anything. It really helped us early on because it removed all doubt about what either one of us was really like.
Ok, so Katie saw his facebook page and comes to find out, he had a friend that she knew. I screamed!!! I recognized the name because Brandon always talked about this best freind that he had that lived in Minneapolis, MN. But it turns out that his best friend is in Katie's ward!!!!!!!! So Katie immediatley e-mailed the wife and said, "hey, I have this friend here from KC, and she is recently divorced with three kids, and I am really protective of her because I don't want to see her get hurt again. But she met this guy online and supposedly you are good freinds, so can you tell me what you really think of a guy named Brandon S****?"
Her friend replied back with the best recommendation ever!!! She said, "yeah, we know Brandon! He is the best guy EVER!!! Your friend would be so blessed to have him in her life!"
After reading that Katie lighened up, my parents, my sister, my other firends, etc, all laid little low! Having a personal recommendation from someone really helps!!!!!!!!! Especially since there are so many creeps out there!! AND, it really helped me to open up my heart more. I was so scared to trust, and this recommendation really helped to calm some of my fears!
Three days later, on Christmas Day, we had out first date...via text! Him and I think it's cute, but I am sure that some of you want to gag. That's fine. We know we're cute. :) We watched the same movie at the same time, it's just that I was in Minnesota, and he was in Arizona. We even texted that we were holding hands, and such. It was so incredibly cute!!! Ah, text romance! :)
Brandon and I continued to talk and text all the time, and after only one week of talking on the phone, I was so completely head over heals falling for this guy!
We talked about meeting each other. And my condition was that I wanted to go out there
first because I wanted to meet his family, and see his work, his house, go to his ward, see the area, etc. I wanted to calm any small fears I had, and any small doubts I had left. I wanted to make sure that I was falling for the 'real' Brandon, and not a liar. Once again, yes, I have trust issues! But Brandon is so amazing about them!! He offered to fly me out, so that I could put to rest any doubts I had. I told him who I wanted to meet, and what I wanted to do when I was there, and he just replied, "yes dear." Isn't he the best!?
Well, I didn't want to meet until the end of January or so, because by then it would've been 6 weeks since we started talking. But then while in Indiana I got my job offer, so because of that, we decided to have me come out sooner. That way I could spend three whole days with him.
So, last friday I flew out to meet Brandon...the guy that I had completely fallen head over heels for. The guy that was so incredibly amazing to me on the phone! But yet, the guy that I had never met!!!
When I got off the plane on friday night I was SICK!!! In fact, that doesn't even begin to describe what I was feeling! I was so nervous! There was so much pressure, because we already had such strong feelings for each other, but yet we had never met!!
Well, we talked on the phone as I went through security, and then he saw me (he said that he was smitten with how beautiful I was!), but I didn't see him for a few more seconds, so he had a total advantage on me! But alas, we made eye contact, and walked towards each other, and gave each other the biggest hug ever!!!!!! There I was...in the arms of my Brandon!
He got my luggage for me, and we started to walk out of the airport and yet, I couldn't even make eye contact with him! I was still so nervous!! I was scared, nervous, & anxious....when will he kiss me...when will he grab my hand...should I just grab his hand...does he think I am cute...is he happy...??? My mind was going crazy!!!!!!!!! So, I decided to just trust, and to put it all out of my mind, and live in the moment. I grabbed his hand, and we walked to the car just making occassional glances at each other. At the car he had a dozen roses for me! When we handed me me the flowers I hugged him again, and then we kissed!! Ah, okay, it was nerve racking, and I was shaking, but from that point on, the night was perfect. We both just had to get the first kiss out of the way so we could relax!!
In the car I dazzled him with my ability to know which direction we were doing...I am a human compass...just one of my many talents! He thought is was great! He actually said how impressed he was! We held hands, we chatted, we were relaxed, and within minutes it felt like we were the normal 'Brandon and Melissa' from the phone. He showed me where he worked (so he was employed...I could check that off my list...check!), and then we went to 'Cold Stone,' and headed back to his house to watch a movie.
By the next morning, we were so comfortable with each other. It was as if we had been married for 20 years. And maybe it is because we are very similar creatures. And maybe it is just because we are so incrediably comfortable with each other. I would pick up the laundry, he would make the beds, I would straighten up the kitchen, he then rotated the laundry, I opened the blinds, he grabbed us drinks for the car...we were in perfect sync with each other. I will say though, it helps that he has been single for so long...he is very self-sufficent, and he likes a clean house, so we fit perfectly together!
Saturday we went to 'Costa Vida' for lunch...YUM!! Then looked at houses, just some model homes for kicks and giggles. It was fun just to see what we both liked and disliked. Amazingly enough, we had everything in common! Seriously!! We agreed on everything, although it does help that he is so easy-going and so agreeable!
After looking at houses, we met up with his cousin and his wife to go bowling! It was so much fun!!!! They are the same ages as us, and we have so much in common with them! Brandon and his cousin are really close and still hang out together all the time, so it was really fun to see them together being so competitve during bowling. Oh, and Brandon scored 179!!! I scored a whopping 52!! Wahoo!! Yay me!!
After bowling we went to dinner at this amazingly awesome and fancy restaurant! It was so beautiful and romantic! There were dim lights, and giant fireplaces all around the restaurtant...it made it really cozy! But the best part was the company. The four of us just had such great conversation, laughed a ton, and found out how much we really do have in common.
At one point I pulled his cousins wife aside, and asked her to just be 100% real with me...to level with me...was Brandon really this great? She said that he was definitely one of the good guys, and I needed to hold onto him tightly, and not let him go! She also gave him a great recommendation and said how perfect we are for each other, and said how cute we look together. Ah, she was right. We did look cute together! Plus, this night helped because I wanted to make sure that he did have good family relations, and check that off my list...check!
(all for of us at dinner)
On Sunday we went to church...there are ward buildings I swear every 4 blocks in Mesa!! It's like living in Utah! But better. He shook people hands, knew people by name...I was impressed...this meant he was active in the church
and had good social skills. So I could check those off my list...Check!
After church we changed, ate leftovers from the night before, talked for hours about lots of important things, and then headed to his Aunt and Uncles house so I could meet the rest of his family. On the way there we had a discussion, (had I still been with 'S' this would've been a huge blown out argument) but with brandon, we still held hands the whole time, talked respectfully, he made his points, I made mine, and then he just asid, "okay, so we discussed it and now we can move on right?" WOW! Can a discussion really go that easily??? He says his point, I say mine, it's resolved, and we move on?? This was heavenly!! Have I mentioned how great our communication skills are?? :)
His family was amazing! They were so accepting, and so inviting. They immendately hugged me, and welcomed me into their home. We laughed, and joked around as if we had been related already for years. Brandon sat quietly the whole time with his hand on my leg and the other one intertwined with mine...watching so see how I interacted with his family. I personally was going crazy! He was being too quiet!! Does that mean that things weren't going as good as I thought? Does that mean that his family doesn't like me?? What does that mean?? Well, nothing. One thing about my guy is that he is quiet when he needs to be, or when he is observing, or just listening. But then he is funny, charismatic, and outgoing when the time comes for it. He's perfect for me. Oh and on a side note, Brandon always opens my car doors...he's old fashioned, which is nice for me, because it reminds me of my dad. Good old fashioned values. But I was concerned that maybe it was all just for show. So, I subtly mentioned it to his aunt, and she said, "no, that is just how Brandon is." Ah, a true gentelman! I could get used to this!
After leaving I asked him what his family thought of me, he replied by saying that when I went to the bathroom his aunt gave him two thumbs up! And his grandma said he was glowing! Who knew a guy a could glow?
Sunday night we talked again for hours on end about all sorts of things. We talked about our future, school, his job, finanaces, our families...he is such an amazing listener, and we communicate so perfectly together! What's funny is that we both swear we already know everything about eachother. We can already order food for each other...know each others favorite songs (in fact surprised me by buying my favorite CD's so I could listen to my favorite songs in the car!)...know about all our families dramas...past relationships...career goals...dreams...you name it, we have talked about it. But what is even better, is that he remembers! He remembers everything I tell him!! It's heavenly!
Monday we went shoppping, and went to 'Costa Vida' for lunch again. Then packed up, and headed for the airport. As I was zipping up my suitcase though, the zipper broke! I looked at him, and was prepared for him to scream. He just looked at the suitcase, tried to fix it, and replied "well, we better hurry to Wal-mart to get you a new one. You grab my keys, and phone and I will carry this." And that was it. It was so simple. So easy. We talked about it the whole way to Wal-mart. I asked him why he didn't get mad at me. He simply just replied, "why whould I? I never get mad." And that is a fact. All of his family said that he never gets mad. He might get quiet, but never mad. Nothing ever bothers him. He really is just that easy going! And how nice for me!! Trust me, this is a nice change!
After switching everything to my new suitcase, we got in the car and sped to the airport. We ran through the airport because we were late (because of the walmart stop), and we just got a few last hugs, a few last kisses, and I was off through security.
So sad.
Within minutes I missed my Brandon!!
So, to sum it up... I had the
MOST AMAZING weekend
EVER!!!!!!!! I couldn't have asked for anything better!
What are the things that I love most about this guy??
- He is so career driven...and finanally savvy!
- He is intelligent!
- He loves me for me...no mater what I say, or what I have done, his feelings for me never change.
- He accepts the "package" (all four of us!)
- He lives the Gospel!
- He is funny!
- He has amazing communication skills! And great listener!
- He is so easy-going!
- He loves to take care of others, and especially me!
- He is soft spoken and tender-hearted!
The list really goes on and one, but that 's enough for now, because I am sure you will hear me mention a lot more about him in the future!
So that post was really long, but there is the story of Brandon and I. Hope you enjoyed!
Lily and Ash in their matching pj's, and Ash with her mouth full of banana
I am sure I could post many more pictures, but that is enough for now. 
